So last night I had a few with Jes while we were hanging out at home waiting for the baby to sleep, and when he did I came in and invited my Sister to lunch Via Facebook.
I then went to bed, my phone still on silent from babysitting and not wanting it to wake up the baby, and Slept until now- nearly 2pm.

I fail at Plans, it would appear.

We will have to try it again, and this time I will remember to leave the volume on. :p

Awesome Day

I had an overall awesome day. My dad came over and we joked and had a good time, I love seeing him. After 5 years we've both changed and realized we're a lot more alike than originally planned. I was babysitting, but baby D was good as usual.

Amy came over and we had a fun time. Watched Bride Wars, which was a great movie and I highly recommend it even if I called the ending 30 minutes before it.

Amy, Jes, D and I went out to dinner where we laughed and had a grand time. I need to make an effort to see my friends more, I forgot how much fun they could be.


Amy can make Fire!

Sometimes there are things that just make me giggle.


After nearly 5 years, Welcome back.

I hate fighting, but its always something that needs to be said. Just unfortunate that while looking out for my best friend, I lose her as well.
Matters not, her ignorance on things and then stating that I'm wrong was getting old.

AIM: The most effective way to fight.

sleepybored1186 (2:06:39 PM): got your IM
sleepybored1186 (2:36:11 PM): gotta say im pretty hurt....but if thats what you want...
sleepybored1186 (3:11:00 PM): quick question though- did you say anything to chris?
WickedYDork (3:13:48 PM): I don't have him on my IM and its your choice to tell him, not mine.
sleepybored1186 (3:14:08 PM): so you didnt say anything?
WickedYDork (3:14:29 PM): Why would I?
sleepybored1186 (3:14:37 PM): its a yes or no question
sleepybored1186 (3:14:57 PM): and i dont know- cause you're a bitch?
sleepybored1186 (3:15:03 PM): thats my guess for sure
sleepybored1186 (3:15:05 PM): bye man
WickedYDork (3:17:26 PM): Im a bitch because I don't want to sit around watching you destroy your life, then so be it. As I said last night you're a hypocrite and a bitch for doing it to him. But again, your choice your body. I just cant sit idly by giving advice you're going to ignore.
sleepybored1186 (3:18:29 PM): and you're a hypocrite....so is everyone else. you spent months in your basement drinking
sleepybored1186 (3:18:29 PM): but fine, your choice
sleepybored1186 (3:18:35 PM): again i say, bye mah
sleepybored1186 (3:18:37 PM): *man
WickedYDork (3:19:06 PM): But I never dragged people into my problems and issues and then ignored their advice and help.
sleepybored1186 (3:21:33 PM): oh, you didnt, huh?
sleepybored1186 (3:21:35 PM): lol
sleepybored1186 (3:21:36 PM): k
WickedYDork (4:23:10 PM): I love how through all of this all you care about is the fact that I could have told Chris. Which means you feel guilty since you don't want him to knwo. If it meant nothing you wouldn't give a shit.
WickedYDork (4:23:14 PM): Grow the fuck up, Emily

Uhm, Excuse me, WTF?

When I turned 22 and stopped drinking so much I assumed that everyone would follow me. This did not happen.

What I didn’t anticipate was still having to babysit drunk people when I was sober. I am above this, I am not your babysitter. I am a sober person who doesn’t want to deal with your drunken bullshit.

If you need a DD that's fine. But if you want someone to take you to IHop and make sure you don’t choke on your own vomit while eating pancakes,

count me out. You’re almost Twenty Three, Emily, Get your fucking act together and start behaving as such.

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Girls Just Wanna Have fun!

Yesterday afternoon I woke up only to grab my phone and call a half a dozen numbers in hopes that one of them would be Chantel’s house number that I had foolishly forgotten to save. Or so I thought.

I had about  4 different numbers for her, various cell phones and things, and Jes had two.

Thankfully, one of them worked and I headed over to her house to pick her up for lunch thinking Jes would be right behind us.

Bitch, Why you be messin wit mah homie?

So Chantel, Nevaha, Mathew and myself get to Fridays and get a table that I believe was meant to seat 16. We then proceed to cover the entire table in our crap. Jes showed up after we had ordered and eaten our appetizer but it was no big thing. I had two glasses of wine and (Horrah!) Jes had a mudslide.

"What kind of cross dresser doesn't have lipstick?"I watched Chantel color in “Bobby” on the menu who I had made a cross dressing hooker. She was very upset that there was no red for his lips, “eh, make em’ blue it still gets cold at night on the streets of Chi!”

Our food quickly came and we ate and talked and laughed. With several breaks to go outside to smoke, bringing the young girl with us who was getting squirmy. Apparently 4 year olds do not appreciate the magic of sitting in a restaurant for nearly 5 hours laughing and gabbing.

Sometimes you just have to entertain yourself.


After lunch had ended, us having a damn good time laughing and joking, we all went our separate ways. But after having a fucking Kick ass afternoon with my two best friends, I can only say that we should all get together far more often than once a month.



After we got back to Chantel’s house she made it her mission to clean out my car, which is quite the task. She got through that and I had to leave, heading to my mom’s to say hi before coming home.


On the way home Amy B. from Applebee’s called me and needed me to edit her English final. I told her to come on over and I will go over it with her. It took a few hours, and I cooked dinner as well, but all in all it was a relaxing day for me.


Although that very well could have been the two glasses of wine.

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Always looking to improve

So in an attempt to at least make my life appear more interesting to the masses I’ve downloaded Windows Writer, which i stumbled upon while.. well using stumble upon.

One thing is this will take a while to get used too. And if I don’t like it, I just go back to blogger. But at least this way I can pretend to be doing really super important things even if I am just blogging about how much I should be sleeping instead of blogging.

Have a good night…er…Morning folks.

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Work Stories

So on the 24th I went to work on no sleep. I took a sleeping pill when I got home at 10pm but then Jes had to go to the ER because her throat was swollen. I was babysitting. Since I don't wake up when the baby cries normally, I knew I wouldn't on a sleeping pill.
So I stayed up till Jes got home at nearly 3am. Knowing it would be pointless to sleep 2 hours and then go to work, I called Emily and we headed off to Denny's for breakfast.

Fast forward.

I get to work and I'm fine. I have enough coffee and red bull in me to run a village. Enter customer #1. He's buying Nicotine gum and something else. he swipes his card and puts it away faster than you can say "Walmart" after a second it asks to verify his signatures, so I ask for a photo id and the card he used.
He throws a fit, "Why couldn't you have asked when I had it out."
"Well sir, it prompts me, and I have no idea when it is going to ask."
"This is why I never shop here anymore."
"So sorry sir, *Hands receipt* have a nice afternoon" (note it's like 8am at this point.)

He walks away till he's about 10-15 ft away and goes, "*grumble* It's still MORNING!"

I wanted to say, "Fine, have a good morning but a shitty ass afternoon, buddy!" but then I didn't want to loose my job.
I went about in my day.

Customer number two was a couple, about 50-60 and they had a visa giftcard that you have to run like a credit card. With these, if it's less than the total bill you have to know exactly what is on it or it will decline it.

"Ma'am, how much is left on the card."
"oh, I don't know...30?"
"Ok." So I punch in "30 Credit" and she slides the card.
It goes through and I go, "alright, it took thirty off your remaining balance is..."
"what? You only put in thirty? Well now I have to carry this stupid card around, and what good are you?"
Her husband breaks in, "I'll carry the card." at this point he has slid his card and while I'm apologizing to the woman he barks, "Press the credit key." and I do.

Part of me wanted to say, "Look lady, if there was 32.75 left on it you'd still have to carry the damn card around!" But I didn't.

Later, I was in the breakroom enjoying my lunch of air when Amanda, the talkative idiot comes to sit by me. She's babbling about something and mentions the thuder storm we had last summer. "yea, I was talking to my cousin on the mic and the power went out and I said, "Hello... Are you there?" and he said "Yea..."
And of course I went, "If your power was out how was your computer and internet still on?"
She had to think about it, after blushing. So note to self don't listen to a damn word she says.

I'm sure theres more, but I'm so tired that I can't think straight. I've started carrying a note pad with me so I can write down crazy incounters at work, because it's far more interesting than my actual life. Thank god tomorrow I'm off because if I have one more day of stupidity I might just kill people.

And again...

Don't have a whole lot to say at this point. I spent 16 hours sleeping last night and feel like I could go for another 10. My foster dad is in the hospital. I plan on stopping by the house before work today and finding out if there is any update.

Its amazing how you can be so tired from lack of sleep but in a moment bad news can make you wake up better than caffeine.
50 minutes until I have to leave for work. I wonder if thats enough time for a nap?

Oh and someone remind me to blog about the following:
3 Asshole customers. 1 Lying Co-worker. Old Lady Confronting a line of cars. Kay being mean to me.

Yesterday was an interesting and fun day. But my throat hurts. And I have to sit here now for an hour. Yay!


Writing out of boredom

Everytime I read a book I have this urge to write. I finish the book and have a few moments of "Wonderful!" or "Dreadful." or "Blech at that ending." and it's never the same with books as it is for movies, but reading a book takes so much more time.

After my moment of book review to myself, I sit or lay wondering why I haven't bothered to write one. Perhaps it's because I can't put myself out there. I think it's more to do with the fact that a giant "Ah ha!" Idea has yet to hit me, and the ones that do never quite make it further than the first few paragraphs.

Short stories have always been easier for me, because somewhere along the pages of a long story I lose interest. And if I, the writer, can't remain interested then who else is going to? I wouldn't ask anyone to read something even I couldn't finish.

It's been a while since I've written anything fictional. But to fill that absence I have blogged more here, which is a bonus for you. I promise. I want to be creative, I want to write. I want someone to read what I write and have a moment of contemplation, and then perhaps I in turn can inspire them.


The Smart One

Just finished reading another book, The Smart One, by Ellen Meister. It's a story of three sisters, Claire, Beverly and Joey (Joanna). It follows them through love, life and lots of trips to the hospital. They find a Metal drum under their neighbors house and when they open it there is a body of a girl in there. I won't ruin the story for you, but it's damn good.

So I have two books down and three to go. I'm sorely tempted to stay up tonight reading "Serendipity" but then again I'm also tempted to get a full 18 hours of sleep. Only time will tell what this night has in store for me.

Twenty Wishes

I just finished reading Debbie Macomber's latest book, Twenty Wishes. It's a story about a group of widows who decide to create a wish list of 20 things they want out of life.
It follows each of them on their journey to accomplish each wish, with twists and surprising and charming turns along the way.

The book has inspired me to write my list of 20 wishes, perhaps you can too?

1.) Write a book.
2.) Own a horse
3.) Laugh so hard I'm crying for hours on end like I used too.
4.) Stay up all night with my friends.
5.) Buy one pair of outrageous shoes and wear them often.
6.) Be a size 10 again.
7.) Learn how to make Creme' Brulee.
8.) Run Five miles.
9.) Read a million books.
10.) Master the art of Yoga.
11.) Own 200 pairs of shoes.
12.) Have kids.
13.) Go to Germany again.
14.) Go to Paris, Rome, Italy, Spain and Australia.
15.) Become a teacher.
16.) Take cooking classes.
17.) Buy a house; plant a real garden.
18.) Build a tree house.
19.) Stop bottling my emotions.
20.) Dance barefoot in the rain.


Domain Names

I figure if I want to be a bit more mainstream with my blog I need to get out there. I Dropped ten bucks on a domain name, although it takes a day or so for it to get set up or something.
So now, when you come to my blog you will be redirected to JenBoyd.com

I know, I'm so hip and cool it hurts. Heres hoping my traffic increases and my profits rise, eh?

EDIT: After fighting with it for an hour and being confused and customer assistance not really helping I canceled everything. It looks like my measly blog will be staying right here at blogspot for the time being.


The last week

I suppose I should catch everyone up on my week of John time, eh?
We'll start with Wednesday. It was a long day, but a good one at the same time. It all started with a magical trip to starbucks to pick up coffee before heading out to see my dad in Skoakie. It was a beautiful day outside, 50 something degrees and sunny. Lovely spring weather. Few degrees more and It would have been perfect.

We stopped at my dads house so I could pee and prepare him for the fun that awaited him. See, John promised me that I could have a shopping day. The boy foolishly handed me his credit card and said to have fun. HAHAHA. Moron.
So we went to Old Orchard mall, which is a block away from my dad's house. At lord and Taylor I was accosted by this small woman who had a heavy accent that I still can't place. It turns out Dior has come out with a new foundation! And would I like to try it.

Well I am a big fan of free things, so I agreed quickly. I sent the boys to starbucks hoping they would remember my coffee order, and yet when they didn't I wasn't surprised. This woman used 20 things on my face and in the end I was pretty, but I was ready to get out of that chair. She tried to sell me everything under the sun but I only purchased the face cream, which I will use, and the lipgloss because I love lipgloss. Why did I do this? Because I wanted a free gift with my purchase! I ended up getting a lipgloss/lipstick thing that I really like.

After that we headed outside to walk the perimeter of the store, slowly stopping in at places and looking at things and trying them on.
Some of the highlights of the trip included:
1.) Calling Emily for fashion advice from the fitting room at some store.
2.) Getting stuck in a dress at the gap.
3.) Getting Chocolate truffles from Ethels and me just realizing now John never finished his.. *Runs to living room to eat*
4.) My Dad and John bonding over how much they hate shopping.
5.) Scaring not only John but my father as I wandered through Tiffanys with a credit card in hand.

After we finished shopping we headed to my Dad's to meet with Candy, the neighbor who is a really nice lady. We sat and talked for a while before being rescued by Barb to go eat dinner. Which I must say was flippin' delicious. California Pizza kitchen is the bomb. No doubt.

After stuffing ourselves on Wild Mushroom and Carribean Jerk Chicken Pizza we headed to Dad's to lounge on the couch watching TV before I realized I was so tired I wanted to go home. We said our goodbyes and quickly made it out the door. I had plans to stop at Starbucks, but unfortunatly I had so much Pizza my stomach was begging me to fart and not put any more food inside of me.

And for Photographic evidence of insanity, here is my Father. Who I had to fight with to get his picture. He's a very defensive driver, and scares the shit out of me when he brakes. (Really hard. Sudden. Freakishly horrible.) I conviced him I wanted the cops to have photographic evidence of the man who killed me. He enjoys tormenting me, but truth be told I am his favorite.



We woke up early to a lovely spring day outside and headed to Emily's house to pick her up before hitting the Starbucks for coffee, because lets be honest, I'm just not human until I've had some caffine.

After the Starbucks we got to Color me Mine, and for those of you who are unaware what that is, it's a place where you buy peices of unfinished pottery and then spend the afternoon painting them. It's so unbelievably relaxing that I think it's going to be my new therapy.

We all selected our pieces and sat down to some serious business. Which is what this is, serious business.
All in all we had a kick ass time, I painted two mugs while John painted one. Emily painted a mug and a picture frame. It costs a bit of money, but I think it was well worth it for a relaxing two hours of fun, and the massive mess we made but didn't have to clean up.

After we finished we realized we were all hungry as hell, so we headed to the diner Three brothers for some lunch. John and I split a sandwich that came with soup. It was very delicious, no doubt.

We dropped Emily off and headed home for the rest of the afternoon, playing Ravenhurt Manor until we were too tired to move. We passed out and said goodbye to yet another day.

Wednesday will be updated later, because John is now done sorting my laundry and is fully prepared to head off to my mom's.

My Week thus far

Howdy readers! I know I've been a bit lax in the updates lately, but when I get home from my long days I don't really feel like writing anything. Plus this Cold I woke up with on Monday is literally trying to kill me. But have no fear, for I am armed with Dayquill and nightquill. So all will be ok.

Where should I start? I suppose Monday is good.
Monday: I woke up around 7:30am since I went to bed early the night before. I Picked up my room a bit and showered. Grabbing my purse I headed to my Mom's house where I hung out for a bit chatting before stealing not only her I-Pass, but her cell phone as well seeing as I forgot mine. (Ooops.)
Headed to Ohare to pick up the English and it started to rain. Not like, drizzle rain, but downpour. Try driving in that while going 60 on I-90. It's not easy and by the time I got to Ohare I needed to punch something in the face. But alas, I didn't.

I sat around, waiting for John until finally I saw him on the opposite side of the terminal, looking at his phone and being generally confused. I went and got him and off we went. In the rain.
(Rain sucks.)

On the way back we stopped at Walmart to shop for Groceries, knowing we shouldn't spend any money. Well we walked out with a new 19'' flat screen TV for my bedroom, a New Dell HP Desktop and a few other goodies. Seriously, we need to stop spending money. We're so dumb. lol.

We stopped at my Mom's house yet again to drop off the I-pass and the cell phone and also to pick up my boxes of books. We get back to the apartment and start cleaning and putting my books away. After the books were sorted we brought in the TV quickly setting that up. I grinned happily as he lugged in the giant computer box and we quickly got it assembled and running.

It's beautiful. Seriously. I would marry my desktop computer if I didn't have John.

The rest of the day was spent playing the sims and other various games, downloading this and that and then we heard the fight.
Joey was yelling at Jes for some reason, and he left leaving her crying. She didn't want to talk about it so John and I went for a ride to get a power strip, cigarettes and just give her some time to herself. We invited her out to dinner but she declined, so we ended up at the Applebees where we had yummy food and a few drinks.
It was good, and then we came home and he went to bed, where as I was wide awake, so I played the sims some more.

Thats Monday for you, when we get back from my Mom's tonight I will update you all on Tuesday and the rest of the week. Have a good day!


Dear Diary,

I understand that when one gets off work at 1am they are wide awake. But perhaps next time you should have a bit more consideration for those who you happen to live with, because I have to now go to work on very little sleep which makes me an angry girl.
If I had known in advance that you were going to be slamming things around and talking loudly I would have not bought you the cute easter thing, and instead purchased a set of ear plugs.
For the love of god, Learn some fucking respect and manners before I move out and leave you here to handle the rent on your own.



Yesterday I had a family come through my line. As the woman was paying the man said to his daughter,
"Only stupid people work at walmart. That right there is the face of someone who didn't go to college."

We're all very lucky I didn't shove my hand scanner up anyones ass, because boy howdy was I tempted too.


My Apartment

I don't like it here. I'm back to walking on eggshells and I don't know why. I hide away in my room and I hate the fact that Joey is out of jail. I don't want him here. Thankfully he hasn't been here other than the night he got out.
I don't like it. I want it all to change. Maybe it's me though.

On another note, I should have just gone to my sisters tonight instead of out with the Walmart girls. It sucked more than a hoover. Seriously, there was not enough tequila to make the conversation interesting. Shame.


Walmart Shoppers

I am so sick of my job. Every day it is just more crap shoveled on top of the crap that I've dealt with for the last few months. I keep thinking that the customers are going to get smarter, that they will be less crabby, but I am so wrong.
Common occurrence is customers slide their debit card, informing me it's credit. They don't tell me it's a debit card so I hit the credit key and wait. They stare at me and then go, "Well, are you going to hit the button?" not knowing I already did.
"What does the screen say?" I will ask them.
"Key pin, but I Don't want to use my pin."
"Hit cancel, select credit." and then I sigh. This happens dozens of times a day. Dozens. And each time it makes me want to curl up in a ball and forget I have a job.

Just because I work at walmart, it does not mean I am stupid. It means the economy sucks and I needed a job. Stop judging the person behind the register.

Also, if your kid is screaming, do not leave it in the cart while you go look for something. This happened yesterday, and I was about to walk over and shut the damn kid up myself. This is why if you're going to go shopping with kids, take both parents. That way if one is not behaving you can get them the hell out of the store. No one, and I mean no one, wants to listen to them scream. I don't care how fucking cute they are.

We get that easter is just around the corner. We get that your kids are still lied too about the easter bunny. But why should I put four items in a large bag and then double bag it for you? Why should you be so demanding? More importantly, where the fuck did your manners go? I understand that I'm paid to help you, but aren't you as a human with emotions and a brain supposed to know that manners get you every where?

I had a lady the other night who had a massive order, just massive. And I started ringing up her items and she barked, "No, Wait. I want to watch the prices."
So I calmly said ok and pulled the items out of the bag and voided them so she could see. I thought all was well until her mother started moving things from bag to bag, and double bagging and bitching about how I can't do my job right.
Heres a hint folks: The way you put it on the belt is going to be the way it goes into the bag. I'm not going to reach on my tippy toes for the package of hotdogs to keep with the cold stuff.
We try, we all do. To keep Chemicals with Chemicals, Cold with cold and food with food. But if you have shit thrown up there in a strange mixture we're just going to bag.

After it was all said and done, and she had paid the woman complained to someone about me. I gave her attitude apparently and did a shitty job.
I was unaware that you could do a shitty job at scanning items and throwing them in a bag. Who knew?

As for the attitude part, I'm not going to be a fucking rose after I hear how crap I am at my job. I'm going to continue being crap and since you're already fixing my mistakes I'm going to try to make it even worse for you.

One final note on Walmart if you are rude, mean or just plain ignorant I have been known to reach down while putting the bread in the bag and squish it.
Keep that in mind next time you go through someones line. We all have feelings and the majority of the time that person behind the register hates her job, wishes she could go back to whatever she was doing before the economy tanked out and get a bit of respect. So for the love of god, say hi to her, smile at her, and thank her.
That is all we ask. That and maybe learn how to fucking work the credit card thing.


Ok, time to talk.

I'm jealous. I read blogs day in and day out, thanks to stumble. I manage to find some I like and bookmark them, checking weekly, some even daily. I see people like EvilBeet make a living off blogging and thrive at it and I get jealous.
I want to write and get paid for it! I want people to hang on my every word and wonder what I'm going to say next. It happens at walmart, but thats only because in a 7 hour day of cashiering I'm pretty much the funniest thing there next to the guy buying the Enema and baby oil.

I need to get back into the habit of writing. I need to start writing constantly, even if I don't feel like it or my idea isn't that good. I'm debating opening another blog just for short stories or writing little tidbits. I normally got my writing out by Mafia.org but now I can't be bothered because the game sucks so bad and the same thing happens time after time.

I wish someone would just knock on my door and tell me I'm brilliant and that they want to publish me. (I wrote punish first, what does that say about my brain?) Frankly, I just want the easy way out. I'm all for writing and writing and writing, it makes me happy. But I'm not ok with the whole "Your writing needs to improve." bit of it. I don't like judgment, not on things that come from my heart.

So my new years Resolution, although a bit late, is to start writing again. Not just writing, but spilling every damn thought that is in my head. Making sure that nothing remains locked inside of me, regardless of how painful it could be to have someone tell me they don't like it.

And the other resolution is to find a fucking writing class online and sign up. I need stimulation, and I need to get back into the swing of things. Because blogging is wonderful, but I'm never going to get a book deal off the shit I Put here.


I unclogged a toliet today! All by myself!

Granted, I probably clogged it all by myself, but lets take a second and be proud of me. I went to ACE hardware and picked up a plunger and drain-o. I beat the clog! I have emerged victorious!

In other news, I can't wait for England. Now that the stress of wondering and the worry is gone, I'm super excited to sleep in a tent! Horrah!

I wish I had more to say, but the urge to write has kinda vanished. It sucks, and I feel bad about it, but until I have something interesting to put here I'm kinda not going to babble on like I am doing right now.


OH! Im looking for recipes to make while John is here, so If you have a favorite please post it. I do want to try these lemon pancakes I found, and maybe shrimp scampi. But I still need more ideas please and thank you!


Sweet Pampering

Knowing that I have finished two out of my six day work week, I prepared myself for the remaining four days by indulging in a bubble bath that smelt like vanilla cupcakes.
After about 40 minutes of soaking and singing Cher songs at the top of my lungs, I showered and am now sitting in my warm room about to enjoy a cigarette before I get dressed and blow dry my hair.

John is here on the 13th, shame he's going to miss Jesus. (HIDE THE EGGS!) But I have some how managed to get five days off that week by begging and pleading with people I work with. Success is mine.

So while he is here we will plan the wedding, eat home cooked goodies and enjoy our time together while I Slaughter him at video games, drinking games and quite possibly even sex games.

I can not wait.


Theres been a few ups and downs regarding my trip to England this summer. But now, now I have nothing to worry about because I can go. They have sent me my visa, and if the buzzer works it should be here later today.
Other wise tomorrow I have to pick it up from the office. But I have the visa, I was approved, and I can stop stressing about it.

After they got all of my paperwork, since I didn't send them a bank statement with my name on it, so I had to fax it the other day... It only took about a day for them to look at it and go, "Yup. She's not poor. Accepted!" which rocks my socks off.

But now, its super early in the morning and I want caffine. I shall continue writing at a later date. Probably after my 6 days in a row at work. You know, since everyone totally works six days in a row. *Slits wrists*



Maybe I'm selfish, but perhaps its time for that?

Emily and I made plans a few days ago to go to dinner tonight. She decided to get wasted last night and be hung over this morning. Which is fine, except she's drinking everyday. We worry that I'm an alcoholic, but she puts me to shame.
She bailed on the plans due to last night she got home and decided to fight with her boyfriend about nothing. So instead of me having an awesome fun night with my friend, I had a shitty night sitting at my computer thinking.

Thanks Emily, you know how much I love to think.

So I told her, until the drinking is no longer a problem I can't keep doing this. I look forward to things, and then when I'm told their not happening it's like someone telling me there's icecream only to tell me it's melted right before I get out the scoop. Or something like that.

These three days I have tried to fill my time up with activities, most of which have involved being at my parents house, where I am calm and rational. Where there are people to talk too and bother.
But tonight I'm stuck alone in my room with nothing but the voice in my head to keep me company.
Oh and the captain, which I will be pouring shortly.