12/28/2008

A letter to John...

Dear John,
I know that right now you are thousands of miles in the air headed home, but I want you to know that I love you and you have made the last week wonderful. I know I bother you, and I'm sometimes mean and smack you around but I love you. And you didn't balk at the amount of money I spent, you didn't care how much I spent when it came to my family and you were there every step of the way while I freaked out over cooking dinner.

You started my coffee in the morning and poured me endless diet cokes just to see me smile. You dropped money like it was nothing just because you know I've been stressed out about rent. You woke up before dawn and scraped off my car. You did my dishes and my laundry, you held me tight when I was having nightmares.

You my dear are amazing, and I love you so much. Every minute away from you hurts, but I know the end results will be great. I know I give you shit, and I'm a bit of a brat from time to time but I love you, and its not about money or anything else, it's about how even when I'm mad you make me laugh so hard I'm snorting. About how I can be free and myself with you, and have no problems trying to pretend to be something else, because you love me for me. And I dear, love you for you, silly dancing, farting, and snoring... all of it. Because you, you make me a better person.

I hope your flight lands safely and we both know that until I get that 6AM phone call from you saying you are not dead I will be sitting up nursing my captain and coke worrying. I'll try to distract myself with TV and perhaps a bit of guitar hero, but I will be doing what I do best.. Worrying.

Until the next time I can hold your hand and see you smile at me, I'm not as happy as I could be, but I'll pretend and I'll make it through. No worrying about me, because I know that eventually I wont have to drive you to O'Hare anymore, and I wont have to look at the seat next to me in the car blinking back tears.

Only Two months, but it sure feels like forever.

2 comments:

MrK said...

ko

MrK said...

Well as interesting as my last comment was "Ko" really didn't cover half the things I wanted to say :p

I don't think I can put down in words how much you mean to me, so I will start with, I love you.

You don't bother me and you're not mean, I've never wanted you to be anything other than what you are, so I'll say again what I have said many times before, please don't change. The original is now and always will be the best.

I am amazing? No, you are amazing. I just kind of tag along trying to keep up with you, maybe one day I'll be on the same level but lets be serious, with my level of retardation along with my bent fingers and penchant for GBP it's highly unlikely and mostly just a flight of fantasy.

BUT I CAN DREAM! YUS!

I'm going to stop before I become a gushing, soppy mess and end as I began with, I love you and I can't wait to get back to you again.

-John